Can't stop Can't stop!!!

Oh god.. I just cant stop thinking about it. Shit.. Keep waiting and waiting and waiting. For what??? Damn it.. I hate being like this again.. No choice but PLAY~~ Forget the reality by entering the gaming atmosphere. Am I insane? Nearly I think.

Yea.. I have stopped taking picture... Please don't ask why anymore. No point taking it. As if I would send to anyone else again... No. It will just hurt me more and more.

Shit.. Why so sad? I still have long path to walk. New people to meet. New things to learn. That decision I made it myself. 'Waiting for the old one instead of looking for the new one" Should I let it knock me down now? I won't die without men. What's the point being a millionaire, but you can't buy the thing you desire the most?

How much I wish I never had a feeling. Banana, how can I say forget then forget? Is he really a lousy guy? No!! I was the one being lousy. Shit Shit Shit!! I hate being honest to myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dying

The feeling.. is stronger than i thought... It's killing me Again.. Im tired.. Im sick of it. I know I was wrong. Im sorry..

Smart and Stupid had a fight. Stupid won. Smart left me and Luck was going with Smart. So now I have no Smart, no Luck...

Im dying.. My soul is trying very hard to leave my body. Trying its very best to leave me.. leave this useless body.. which cant do anything..

Regret

Now that Im regret. Damn regret. I don't want to lie and I hope there's no need to lie. I realized I had screwed everything up again. Again. Shit. Why must I ruin everything when it was all going so perfectly? Man.. I just hope that it's not too late. I still need time, more time to get ready. I wasn't trying hard and yet I'm wasting time here. I have to become better. Im sorry I really am... But i need time to be better and I promise I will try. I need to learn more and more and more. Please, wait... I don't care what's the feedback going to be, but at least, let me explain...

I want to explain.. Im serious this time.